A Prayer For My Birthday

Still waiting for the Pope’s first tweet.

I understand God must be silent

but, come on, Pope!

Give us some gossip!

Who are you wearing?

Who’d you have dinner with?

What is Your Holiness’s opinions on what’s trending?

How does His Holiness feel about #RitaWhora?

Lead me, oh Your Holiness past the temptations of having to respond to every trend

deliver us from the evil of killing time

where I find I’m spending all afternoon trying to think up my next tweet

and unwritten poetry sits on the top shelf of my mind

never seeing the light of a computer screen

the next Bible will be written on Twitter

you just wait and see

I don’t expect it to be by me

I’m too busy trying to come up with a pithy 140 characters

on #RitaWhora

who’s RitaWhora?

let’s murder more time finding out

that a Kardashian is being talked about for something sexual

why is this news?

Now my head is polluted with more rubbish

and the only way to dump it is to write about it

and now here I am

writing about the Kardashian’s

though I’ve never seen their show

I haven’t even seen one of their sex tapes

yet here I am exposing myself to them

(and you too!)

save me, Pontiff from the lineage of St. Peter!

For thine is your Twitterdom!

The power! and the glory!

forever and ever

ah, tweet.



4 thoughts on “A Prayer For My Birthday

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