Love Sucks

“You didn’t,” he whispered standing over me. I couldn’t look at him. He looked delicious, absolutely the most delicious man I’d ever seen. I couldn’t look at him, I couldn’t look at him, I couldn’t look, I couldn’t look. He didn’t make it any easier for me, climbing into bed with me, wrapping his bloody arms around me, I could smell his blood, I could taste it rushing in his veins just beneath the skin. “Can you maybe just take a sip of me? Like just take enough so I don’t die. Like don’t take so much to turn me vampire.”

I didn’t want to hear what I’d just heard.

“No,” I said. I didn’t turn, I couldn’t turn. I couldn’t look at him. I didn’t want to feel him, I wanted to eat him.

“Won’t you feel better? I’ll be ok, I can take it, but look at you, Sarah, you’re not well. I’m worried about the baby. We need the two of you well, and that means eating, and sweetheart, tonight, I’m what’s for supper,” he laughed, though I knew he wasn’t joking. I didn’t laugh.


“Please just take a couple pints, I can replace it. It’ll be like I’m neck feeding you. We already have a very special relationship between us, this will be like taking it to the next level. Come sweetheart, dig in.” He lowered his neck to my mouth.

“No,” I said, but less convincingly. His offer sounded scrumptious.

“Sweetheart, you have to. You have yourself a little suck of blood, then you save the rest for me. Then we’ll both rest all the way to Russia.”


He got on his knees and held my shoulders. “Sarah, you have to suck my blood, because our child is dying and you’re not doing so well either and I can spare the blood, so here is my neck, unless you know a better way.” He closed his eyes, lowered his neck and held it right in front of my mouth. It was the first time anyone had ever offered me their neck. It’s the closest thing to impotence I have ever felt, having all the components in front of me, but, not being able to put any to work. I couldn’t I just couldn’t, though I was starving and he was right. Still, I couldn’t. He opened his eyes.

“Sweetheart, I can’t suck your blood.”

“You gotta eat, and we gotta get this over with, cause this is kinda freaking me out.”

“Well, if you’re not comfortable with it.”

“Of course I’m not comfortable with it, who’d be comfortable with someone sucking blood from their neck? But, it’s gotta be done, so, let’s get sucking, but stop before making me vampire.” He closed his eyes, tense.

I wanted to kiss him, hug him and eat him up. I love this man, I thought. I put thoughts into actions, whispering in his ear, “I love you,” before nestling my fangs softly in his neck.

It’s strange sucking the neck of someone you love. First, you’ve always got to keep that in mind, that this is someone you love, and you have to stop sucking before they stop breathing. I was so hungry, it was hard to know how much blood I was taking into me. I kept sucking, I couldn’t imagine ever being full.

I stopped sucking long before I had my fill, pulling my fangs lovingly from his lips, careful not to tear any more of his skin.

“Ravi! Ravi!” He didn’t wake up. “Ravi! Ravi! Come on, Ravi! Wake up!” I tried tickling and shouting. He opened an eye. I kept tickling. I clapped right close to his nose, getting his other eye to open.

“I’m thirsty,” he moaned.

“Thirsty for what?” I held my breath. I exhaled when he said:



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